I’m not alone.

me and Jesus walking towards my future… And Timmy decided to include himself and our child in my picture!



the least i can do on a precious day.

salvation prayer: lord jesus, thank you for loving me and dying for me on the cross. thank you lord for turning a place of darkness into a place of love and grace. thank you lord for washing me clean of every sin with your precious blood. You are my lord and my saviour, now and forever. l believe in my heart that you rose from the dead and that you are alive today. because of your finished work, l am now the beloved child of the god most high and heaven is my home. Thank you lord for conquering death and giving me eternal life. Thank you lord for filling my heart with your peace and joy. truly the best days of my life are head of me. in jesus name, amen.

i know for many, holy communion is a ritual done in church once a week or once a month. but for some of us, it is a daily moment with jesus. we do it in remembrance of jesus and his sacrifice. it is a celebration of his victory. afterall he did say “This is my body which is given to you. Do this to remember Me.” when he broke the bread in pieces. and of the wine he said “Do this to remember Me as often as you drink it.” so i urge you to put away the doctrines and come boldly into his kingdom and commune with Him; just like you spend time with a loved one. he is not someone to be afraid of but he is your best friend.

holy communion prayer:
with bread or biscuit or wafer in your hands – thank you jesus for your broken body. thank you for bearing my symptoms and sicknesses at the cross so that l may have your health and wholeness. l declare in faith that by your stripes, by the beatings you bore, by the lashes that fell on your back, l am completely and forever healed. l believe and l receive your resurrection life in my body today.

with ribena in your hands – thank you jesus for your holy and precious blood that has cleansed me whiter than snow. your blood has brought me forgiveness and made me righteous forever. and as l drink, l celebrate and partake of the inheritance of the righteous, which includes preservation, healing, wholeness and all of your blessings.

there was once in the middle of the night when i was coughing so bad and hard but too lazy to get up for water. in my sleepiness, l imagined myself communing with jesus and drinking a cup of ribena. l could almost feel it sliding down my parched and irritated throat and declared myself well. the next thing i knew, it was morning.

in church today, we each got a book that is filled with healing promises and l saw the salvation prayer and holy communion prayers in it (shared above). i dont know why but there could be someone out there, lingering… wanting more…

today is not about some freaking eggs or bunny. it is about my lord jesus and his sacrifice for mankind. yes for you and me. and today l realised that it is not just one sacrifice BUT two. first daddy god gave up his precious son and second, jesus gave himself up by being obedient. two sacrifices to save us all from destruction and diseases and misery and failure. two sacrifices to give us life and love and hope and victory. no one including me will ever fully understand the depth of this love and sacrifice. this is one of a kind. only god is capable of this.

as l sit here and write this, a question is flashing in my head – if l have to sacrifice (donate) my kidney or my finger to a loved one, perhaps timmy, will i? will i want to put myself through that ordeal? what if he dies and my sacrifice is futile? what if l die on that operating table? what if it is too painful?

thank god that thoughts like these didnt stop him. all He saw was us and he had to give up his precious son for us. that was the only way out. blood of bulls and lambs were not good enough. but HEY, the offering of the precious one was so perfect and complete that his tomb is still empty today. He has risen and alive today! and that same resurrection life and power is in all of us.

amen!! praise god!

on a sudden day-off.

this is new. not the day-off. but reading in Starbucks. not wanting to waste today by just sleeping, I met sheryl for a quick lunch. and having nothing planned for the rest of the afternoon, I found my way here.

it’s only three in the afternoon but the noises are louder than my heartbeats. i have to keep re-reading the first chapter of this book just so I understand what I’m reading. the book is about a 15 year old boy who runs away from his dad to look for his mum and sister.

just like him, I’m gonna run away from this joint. a book written by a haruki murakami deserves a good reader and this place ain’t gonna allow me to be.

the voices are draining me. it’s making me long for company. but I know being just as loud and noisy ain’t gonna cut it today. today is precious after a straight 2 1/2 months of work. today is about me.

when you have experienced quality self-reflective moments or in my case, months, you tend to miss it. at least I did. knowing and appreciating that I have got work cut out for me for another three months make me wanna treasure today a lot more.

I’m so thankful for the past 2 plus months. the first half of the project is almost finishing without any struggles. sure there were frustrations due to different time zones and different English but god is good and greater than any incompetent person. i have made friends and got money in my wallet but the most important of all, is knowing and experiencing the faithfulness of my daddy god!

so i’m glad that though the outside is noisy and overwhelming, the inside is quiet and calm.

the latte is finishing and I have moved too much in my chair and the book is nicely put away. once I’m done with the last sentence, I’m running away… to find nothing. coz all that I needed today is inside.

jesus, I missed you.