shalom.

i have passed by this place forever but never once stepped in.had no reason to.while it is a hospital,it is also a nursing home for the sick and the elderly.it is a very chinese and humble looking place,nothing fancy.this morning i stepped in because i was told they house a TCM centre where one of the doctors could speak english and possibly be very helpful with my right leg.the leg that gets this tight feeling on and off,for the past two years.i have seen a western doc who did all sort of blood tests and found me healthy (thank god!) and so attributed it to stress.i also went to a chinese doc whose effective medicine was just too awful and troublesome to brew.so i left the leg alone but it never quite left me alone.

because the doc i want to see is popular and focused on only 13 patients a day,i missed my chance as i only got in at 10am and the doc starts at 9am.argh.but instead of leaving,i walked around the nursing home.place was huge.green.clean.elderly.frail.sick.sad.but i felt a sense of shalom as i walked around and peeped through the windows.i felt god’s presence as i moved from ward to ward.it was so quiet and breezy.never thought it would feel this way.

filial piety

volunteerism

courtyard

i walked around unnoticed.it almost felt like i didn’t exist.they saw right through me.i wasnt there.i could tell from their faces that they know their end is nearing and at a place like this,i believe they are getting the best they can.in a very strange way,the place was nice.normally,i don’t like being at places like hospitals or clinics or nursing homes.basically places that can potentially be depressing.but this morning,i just didn’t want to leave.i wanted a piece of that shalom that was so real and floating around at the nursing home.i almost wanted to open my mouth as big as possible and swallow it.

i decided i wanted to volunteer.afterall,i am on a break this month.again.yes,i finished my two months stint at dentsu.yipee.but i was rejected.i had to commit at least two years and i could not.they didnt want someone who can only help for one month.i was angry actually.didnt understand how they could turn away help.but i knew they could not stop me from praying.so i volunteered to pray.no one will know anyway.i found a spot to sit and prayed.i heard deep and weak breathing from behind.no it wasnt jesus.it was an old man.and i prayed that they will be always be filled with HIS shalom and strength.and that their last days be easy and gentle.their journey may have been hard and long but i know their last days will surely be easy and full of shalom.

old man

i do want to mention the name of this place.just in case,you want that piece of shalom.but just as i was about to leave,i saw a sign that said photography is not allowed.i dont want to be caught neither do i want to be selfish.so here i am sharing my morning with you.hope you feel what i felt.

shalom.

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